Well, I saw her on Tuesday. We went shopping for Tango clothes. I don't understand why I keep going back for more rejection, and abuse. The patterns are inescapable, and I don't see any way to make anything better between us. Intellectually I know this, but, somewhere, in the dusty corners of my sick mind, I still want her. All the lies, all the cheating, all the secrets and total irresponsibility have not convinced me to walk away.
What will it take to jump start myself into a different consciousness? That is my question for today. I have busied up my time - new people, new activities, but it doesn't fill the emptiness. My life is full, but I have nothing to be excited about. I need a catalyst........
posted by Sober @ Sundown @ 10:46 AM
6 comments
6 Comments:
Whe it gets bad enough, you'll make the necessary changes. She obviously can't fill that emptiness. There is one who can... and that one is God
(as I understand Him).
That is a space that can never be filled by another person.
Intellect and emotions, 2 different beast. You cannot think that emptiness away.
I understand when you speak about your life being full, but you cannot find gratutude. Logically (that darn intellect again) you see what you have, emotionally (the spirit) you cannot embrace it.
A sick spirit needs a spiritual solution. Thank you for putting this out there. With an open mind in time you will discover it. Keep on posting!
You will hang on until you learn the lesson necessary for you to grow.
We have all held on to unhealthy people at some point in our lives.
Why , that is the big question
AND answer.Keep an opened mind :)
Thanks for sharing ~
Hello everyone,
I feel like I am at the end of "holding on", and on the verge of starting on a new adventure. As time passes, and I see how nasty this woman treats me, I want her less and less. I am coming to believe that I deserve better.
Thank you for all your support.
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