Sorry for not posting very much the last few weeks. I sit down at the end of a day around 7pm, and nothing much works anymore. The brain is asleep, the arms are heavy, and my typing skills become nonexistent.

I almost fired my worker and his buddy today. My worker told me that his buddy was a really good concrete footing professional that really knew his shit. Unfortunately, that is not the case. He needs a lot of direction, and waits till he is given a task before he does anything. So, I lost my temper again today, and told my worker that I didn't think his buddy was worth his wages, and that I could get a go-for in here at a much cheaper rate.

My worker wanted to help his friend who is down on his luck, and needed a job, so he brought him over. I don't mind helping someone out, but if they can hardly wait till beer-thirty at the end of the day, I get a little irritated. I have decided to keep him for the rest of the week till all the forms are set, and then he has to go back home. I feel like I am getting one guy for the price of two, and we are not getting the job done any faster.

That brings me to my biggest character defect. I am trying to be patient, but I keep loosing my temper. I have not been even a "fair" example of sober living the last few days. When you hire individuals, and not companies, you never get the best and brightest. I know that, and I can hear my mind telling me that, but I still get impatient with these guys. It is all based on expectations. I expect a certain amount of work done each day. When I see how little has progressed at the end of the week, I get impatient. And, I am not any good at hiding my feelings. It is simply torturous to stay calm, and try to get the most out of these guys.

For example, I don't have a roof covering my house. We took it off last month. I have been trying to get it put back together, but it keeps getting delayed by other tasks. Saturday, at 5:30 in the morning, it unexpectedly started raining. All I could do was get up and go sit in the living room and watch the rain saturate what is left of my house (luckily, I only blew one circuit).

On Sunday, I got up on the roof and started assembling the boards, and nailing them on. On Monday, the guys were functioning at their usual speed, and I had to get really agitated to get them up on the roof. They installed about 80% of the boards, and called it beer-thirty. Today, I had to go up there and finish the entire east side of the roof. At least in the east side, I have something to nail plastic to when it starts to rain. The west is still a big open hole.

Today, I feel a little overwhelmed with all the work that needs to be done in such a short period of time. I am trying to focus on 'one thing at a time', in "one day at a time" and make it through the week. I think I am just exhausted, and need a few hours of sleep before tackling the project again.

I feel like I am just rambling, but thanks for reading..........