Sunday, November 25, 2007

OMG, it has been 2 weeks since my last post. I will have to do better, and get back to weekly postings again. Life has been complicated since the fires in southern California. I still have guests camped out in the living room - 2 humans and a boat load of poodles. I don't know how long they will be here - they lost everything and have a house and kennel to rebuild. There have been a few times when I was pushed to my limits, but overall it isn't all that bad. At least I have a house. I am a bit lost with 'working on the house' since they have spilled into every available room.

The phrase that I have been focused on this week is:

"When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us." by Alexander Graham Bell. This is the first time I have read the entire quote. In AA I have only heard the first portion, "When one door closes, another one opens".

This quote has lifted my spirits, and given me hope this week. After a year and a half I still think about my ex, and wonder how she could be with a man. The thought of it is a bit repulsive, but if that is what she wants..... she can have it. I have spent too much energy thinking about what I lost when she left. Time has changed my perspective a bit and I get glimpses of how personally draining her behavior was. It took a whole lot of energy to get a little bit of companionship. Now, I am excited and ready to look for open doors. I have hope that I will find companionship again.

18 Comments:

At 6:09 PM, Blogger Daniel, the Guy in the Desert said...

It took me years to get over my ex. Now I don't even see how I could have done that.

 
At 6:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Could it be that your ex is simply an opportunist and not necessarily now (or ever) really a lesbian?

If one is truly invested in a relationship it always takes time to move on and let go upon the demise of a relationship. Don't worry about how long it takes - however long it takes you to move on is the right amount of time for you.

Take care.

 
At 9:31 PM, Blogger the only daughter said...

I have hope that I will find companionship again. And so you shall.

 
At 1:27 PM, Anonymous sober Chick said...

Wow what service you are providing. The fires are horrible. It is awful listening to the news and the origin of them.

You know I still think about Kelly even though I am at the other end of the stick. I miss her terribly. I cannot deny that her soul and love still lives within my heart today. It has been about 4 years, and all I hope is that she is happy.

I wish you to find union some day. Your soul deserves it.

 
At 6:44 PM, Blogger BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

Glad you posted the second part of the quote. Like you, I too, have only heard the first part of the quote.

Thinking about the ex is one thing. Acting on those thoughts is quite another. Congratulate yourself, actually!

 
At 4:09 PM, Blogger Rex said...

Don't forget the opening is a window sometimes....we have to be open to all possiblities...if we are to busy looking for the door we might miss the window.

 
At 10:14 AM, Blogger jUSt aNoTHeR aDDicT said...

"I have hope that I will find companionship again."

I just know that you will, Sundown. You are a lovely woman. Someone will find you.

Love,
Scout

 
At 5:46 PM, Blogger BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

Want to wish you a happy holiday.

Stay safe, sane and sober. Two out of three is not bad!

 
At 7:01 PM, Blogger Sober @ Sundown said...

You guys are so wonderful.

Thanks for coming by, and lending your support.

 
At 1:00 AM, Blogger Elizabeth McClung said...

I hope you find companionship too - and I agree with your feeling about the ex - I keep hearing about lesbians who move in with guys and I keep thinking...."but..it's a guy!" - I dunno, just seems so 'unnatural' - I know that a few people have to be heteros for population sake but why do they keep pretending they enjoy it. (sorry, just file heterosexuality under "different strokes for different folks")

 
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